Overall, cancer treatments take a toll on you physically and emotionally. One of the most important things to do for your family member is to be empathetic and provide a lot of support. This will eventually begin to sow seeds of encouragement and help boost a person’s self-esteem.
Mom’s last chemotherapy session was exactly on October 1, 2014. By this time my sister had recently arrived in Puerto Rico to help me with mom since her double mastectomy was scheduled for November 2014.
During that first weekend of October, mom sent my sister and I to the supermarket for some groceries. Since breast cancer awareness month is celebrated in October the supermarket had a lot of balloons and accessories all over the place. When I glanced over to the flower section, I noticed a small arrangement of roses on the shelf and said to my sister “Aww, look how pretty! Let’s get it for mom and celebrate her finishing chemotherapy.” My sister agreed excitedly and walked over to the bakery section where she pointed out a small cake decorated with pink ribbon sprinkles. Eventually, we got mom the flowers, small cake, and a balloon along with all the other groceries she needed.
While my sister and I secretly planned our improvised mini-celebration, mom was home wondering why we were taking longer than usual. As soon as we got home, I sent my sister inside ahead of me with the other groceries and told her to ask mom to close her eyes (for which mom replied, “I knew you girls were up to something!”). I walked into the house behind my sister and placed the flower arrangement into mom’s hand; she immediately started to cry as soon as she felt the weight. When mom opened her eyes she continued to cry even more, but managed to crack a smile while we said to her “Congratulations for finishing chemo mom!” My sister showed mom the small cake we got and mom kept crying while telling us “Girls, you didn’t have to do this.”
Obviously, we knew that providing mom with the mini-celebration wasn’t an obligation, but we wanted to show her how proud we were that she was able to push through the rough waters and get the first part of treatment done. I, in particular, witnessed first-hand how hard it was for mom to get through it all, so I wanted to give mom a small moment of joy. Most importantly, I wanted to give my mother some encouragement to continue forward especially since the road was bumpy from the very beginning. Mom was going through a lot of emotional stress during the chemotherapy process and it was important for me to show her support along the way. Cancer treatments are grueling, so providing the smallest gesture of encouragement goes a long way. My sister and I decided to bring mom some flowers and a cake, but you can really provide happiness through the simplest things. A child’s drawing, reading to the person, something handmade, a basket of fruit, whatever – they’re all sufficient enough to demonstrate love and support. You don’t have to break your head.
Despite the stress that a treatment process can cause on the family, the most important thing to provide is support for each other especially for the person going through the process itself. Everyone needs a shoulder to lean on because the reality is that your overall health is dependent on the state of your mind. A strong focused mind is capable of getting through rough waters more than a weak overwhelmed mind. If you succumb to your fears and insecurity it will eventually be reflected in the physical body, so providing encouragement is key to boost one’s self-esteem.
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